Men & Women = Dogs & Cats
This has been Luis H. Garcia's INSTANT GENDER REVIEW. Enjoy!
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
So I'm playing Fatal Frame II Turbo HD Remix: The Director's Cut
It's a good game so far. I'm on Chapter 6.
It's like, it's not horrifying like Silent Hill 3 was for me, but at the same time it's kind of spooky and neato. You expect ghosts to jump out at you and put static on your screen whenever you enter a new room, and you're rarely dissapointed.
At one part, I looked out a window and then a little ghost boy jumped out at me from the other side and was like "Sup." I jumped a little, but then I just said "sup" back and took a picture.
Oh yeah, I should tell you what this game is about:
Mio and her twin sister Mayu are trapped in a village because they can't step over dead leaves and twigs that block their path. The village is full of ghosts that want to kill them in a ritual sacrifice. You have to lead Mayu around most of the game, Ico-style, and try to prevent ghosts from killing either of you. It's not annoying like an escort mission where the AI keeps getting itself killed.
You fight the ghosts by taking pictures of them. No joke. The closer the deformed, cross-hatched, sometimes bloody ghosts are to you when you snap a picture, the more damage you do. This isn't like RE or SH where it's better to run away from monsters, cuz the ghosts can go through walls and floors and will chase you around until you exorcise them. You also get experience points for taking better pictures that you can use to level up your camera. It's less silly than it sounds.
It's a spooky game that suceeds at what it tries to do: be a fun adventure game with ghosts.
However, the game has one awful flaw: I keep getting stuck in the game because I didn't press A Button in PRECISELY the right place. I end up wondering what I'm supposed to do next until I check GameFAQs and realize that I didn't press A button on EXACTL Y the correct angle of this one table in the room I came to a dead-end in. It's p frustrating. Be sure to ALWAYS be mashing A Button while walking around haunted houses.
The original game is a PS2 game, while the Director's Cut is an Xbox original game. However, it's fully back-wards compatible with the 360, and it hasn't given me a single problem so far. Most other people agree that it's one of the few XBox games you can play on the 360 without a single glitch.
The twins are totally incestuous for each other.
I highly recommend this game if you are better at mashing A Button at every corner of every room than I am.
It's like, it's not horrifying like Silent Hill 3 was for me, but at the same time it's kind of spooky and neato. You expect ghosts to jump out at you and put static on your screen whenever you enter a new room, and you're rarely dissapointed.
At one part, I looked out a window and then a little ghost boy jumped out at me from the other side and was like "Sup." I jumped a little, but then I just said "sup" back and took a picture.
Oh yeah, I should tell you what this game is about:
Mio and her twin sister Mayu are trapped in a village because they can't step over dead leaves and twigs that block their path. The village is full of ghosts that want to kill them in a ritual sacrifice. You have to lead Mayu around most of the game, Ico-style, and try to prevent ghosts from killing either of you. It's not annoying like an escort mission where the AI keeps getting itself killed.
You fight the ghosts by taking pictures of them. No joke. The closer the deformed, cross-hatched, sometimes bloody ghosts are to you when you snap a picture, the more damage you do. This isn't like RE or SH where it's better to run away from monsters, cuz the ghosts can go through walls and floors and will chase you around until you exorcise them. You also get experience points for taking better pictures that you can use to level up your camera. It's less silly than it sounds.
It's a spooky game that suceeds at what it tries to do: be a fun adventure game with ghosts.
However, the game has one awful flaw: I keep getting stuck in the game because I didn't press A Button in PRECISELY the right place. I end up wondering what I'm supposed to do next until I check GameFAQs and realize that I didn't press A button on EXACTL Y the correct angle of this one table in the room I came to a dead-end in. It's p frustrating. Be sure to ALWAYS be mashing A Button while walking around haunted houses.
The original game is a PS2 game, while the Director's Cut is an Xbox original game. However, it's fully back-wards compatible with the 360, and it hasn't given me a single problem so far. Most other people agree that it's one of the few XBox games you can play on the 360 without a single glitch.
The twins are totally incestuous for each other.
I highly recommend this game if you are better at mashing A Button at every corner of every room than I am.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Very Bad Games
Do you remember how back in the day, you would be ready to set EVERYTHING aside just to get the best ending for your favorite games? Well, here is why that magic doesn't happen any more for games like...
1. DEAD SPACE EXTRACTION (Wii)
This game is awesome because you can only kill bad guys by shooting them in the knees and elbows. And it doesn't matter whether you're packing a handgun or an atom bomb.
2. MURAMASA THE DEMON BLADE (Wii)
Colorfully animated 2D graphics always win over minor elements like gameplay.
So what the hell is this game doing at the bottom of my collection?
3. SOUL CALIBUR LEGENDS (Wii)
If you swing your hand left, Ivy will swing her whip to the left. If you swing your hand to the right, Ivy will swing her whip to the right.
And if you...
...well, no. I'm afraid that's all she does.
4. THE CONDUIT (Wii)
This game has got some outstanding reviews from everyone who's played it. So if I tell you that it's a piece of repetitive crap, this will mean that I haven't played it, even if the in-game timer reads "4 hours". (P.S. It's a piece of repetitive crap.)
5. PRINCE OF PERSIA - THE TWO THRONES (PS2)
I'm sure this game is one of the best of the series, but games like this just don't cut it for me. Actually, I'm not really complaining about the game - just only the characters, the gameplay, and the entire concept.
6. VALKYRIE PROFILE 2 SILMERIA (PS2)
Every time I see this game, I want to pick it up and play it. I remember it had very nice graphics and a serene overall theme to it, but the gameplay could have been better. And it could have been made by anyone other than Square-Enix.
7. KILLER 7 (PS2)
If I start playing this outright weird game, my family will sign me up for rehab.
8. CASTLEVANIA: CURSE OF DARKNESS (PS2)
My brother has played this game inside out, and I always used to watch him play this back in the day. But ever since, I haven't really bothered to play it myself. That could be because it blows.
9. MEGAMAN 9 (Wii)
I hate jumping over pits only to get hit by a bird and fall straight down. %%%%ing Capcom.
10. PERSONA 4 (PS2)
OMG why is this game collecting dust! *picks up and starts playing*
Mash / Nov'09
1. DEAD SPACE EXTRACTION (Wii)
This game is awesome because you can only kill bad guys by shooting them in the knees and elbows. And it doesn't matter whether you're packing a handgun or an atom bomb.
2. MURAMASA THE DEMON BLADE (Wii)
Colorfully animated 2D graphics always win over minor elements like gameplay.
So what the hell is this game doing at the bottom of my collection?3. SOUL CALIBUR LEGENDS (Wii)
If you swing your hand left, Ivy will swing her whip to the left. If you swing your hand to the right, Ivy will swing her whip to the right.
And if you...
...well, no. I'm afraid that's all she does.
4. THE CONDUIT (Wii)
This game has got some outstanding reviews from everyone who's played it. So if I tell you that it's a piece of repetitive crap, this will mean that I haven't played it, even if the in-game timer reads "4 hours". (P.S. It's a piece of repetitive crap.)
5. PRINCE OF PERSIA - THE TWO THRONES (PS2)
I'm sure this game is one of the best of the series, but games like this just don't cut it for me. Actually, I'm not really complaining about the game - just only the characters, the gameplay, and the entire concept.
6. VALKYRIE PROFILE 2 SILMERIA (PS2)
Every time I see this game, I want to pick it up and play it. I remember it had very nice graphics and a serene overall theme to it, but the gameplay could have been better. And it could have been made by anyone other than Square-Enix.
7. KILLER 7 (PS2)
If I start playing this outright weird game, my family will sign me up for rehab.
8. CASTLEVANIA: CURSE OF DARKNESS (PS2)
My brother has played this game inside out, and I always used to watch him play this back in the day. But ever since, I haven't really bothered to play it myself. That could be because it blows.
9. MEGAMAN 9 (Wii)
I hate jumping over pits only to get hit by a bird and fall straight down. %%%%ing Capcom.
10. PERSONA 4 (PS2)
OMG why is this game collecting dust! *picks up and starts playing*
Mash / Nov'09
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