TOM RIDER UNDERWEAR mega-hurts preview

I got TOMB RAIDER UNDERWORLD for the PS2 a day ago. It's the PAL version, and that doesn't help. And let me tell you something: this game needs some. I played it for like 2 hours straight yesterday and now my eyes sting worse than STING the has-been wrestler.

Graphics
LARA's bust.. I mean, graphics get an easy 8/10. But this game doesn't exactly have the best backdrops. Now that I think of it, I would say the last TR game had slightly better backgrounds than the junkity junk this game throws at you. And even though LARA looks x100 hotter than Brian Lara, even she can't save the pretty bland and often outrageously horrible polygons that are supposed to look like a jungle.

Sound
For background music we have some nice serene atmosphere that you probably won't even bother listening to. Then the music pumps into METAL GEAR / SPEED mode when the bad guys arrive (whom you have to shoot at pretty mindlessly). Sound effects are OK. That's pretty much your standard PS2 deal. And that's no big deal.

Gameplay
This is where this game shines. I mean, reeks. Because it has tremendous amounts of super slowdown, with the screen at times scrolling at maybe 5 FPS. Maybe it's the PS2's lack of power that's causing all the choppy mess. Or maybe the whole game is supposed to play in Bullet Time.

Plus in the 2 hours that I've played so far, I think I spent 3 of those just swimming under the ocean because I had no idea where to go or what the hell to do.

Other than that, it's your typical TR game. You know, where all you mostly do is zoom in on LARA's.. I mean um, jump, climb, crawl, shoot.. etc. (What?)

Story
Uh huh, yeah. I think there's a story too. Game of the year material. 10/10 I'm sure..

Replay Value
I will be playing TR UNDERWORLD again tonight. Because I'm sick and tired of playing RPGs where I'm a pre-teen who saves the world after 16 million random battles.