Hot off the Presses

Hey everyone, it's me! That guy! Dr. Sub-Zero 2! How's it hanging folks? For me, not so bueno but y'know it could be worse. I could be dead or playing COUGH 2001 or something.

So I've got some news, reviews and lots of boos that I want to get off of my chest.

First of all, dear fighting games community especially DAREALMASTA. I do not like SNK (yeah I spelt it right), I don't. Folks I know IRL say the big T has been negatively influenced by The Mash and such whn in fact that is not the case. I find the majority of SKN games mediocre all around and not that fun minus the few exceptions such as KOF 2003 (yeah that's right, I like 2003 more than XI and 98 when in fact it is total garbage.)

I tried getting into 98 UM and it has become apparent that driving a nail into my wang via hammer would be less painful than fighting Krauser. I've become more and more distant with the current SKN games. They aren't that fun. I will most likely buy KOF XII to see if it's anything spectacular but as I said above I think 98 UM sucks and it's the best one without a shadow of a doubt. Also, with the growing interest in KOF XII stateside, I've come to the conclusion that SKN is like the video game equivalent to Studio GAINAX. When they hit the nail on the head with any sort of effect, they will wh*** it out for years to come. Hence products like the KOF shump, KOF MMO, KOF Movie, KOF date sim, Pachinko and so on. The same is done for a show like Neon Genesis Evangelion. When it became super popular back in the 90's they churned out the eroge games and such and are still making products to this day. SKN finally gets a chance to do the same outside of China and Mexico

However the difference between SKN and GAINAX is that GAINAX churns out spectacular work on a regular basis. SKN has made about 3-5 good games.

• The King of Fighters 98
• The King of Fighters XI
• Garou: MOTW
• Last Blade 2
• Metal Slug 3 (7 is arguable)
  

I compare them to GAINAX what with them being piss poor and wh***ing merchandise like no one can. SKN, please remain humble. Fatgoon is gone and he was half of the ego of the company, please do not start developing your own because you guys traced some 3d models and called them sprites. Get me a Wacom tablet and I can do that too. Apparently so can Arc Sys.

KOF 2002 UM looks like a broken OTG fest. I mean Nameless for example, he has like 6 moves that lift off the ground, one of them being a 40 hit DM. And why is this folks? Because broken is popular! Everyone likes MvC2 right!? No. Not everyone likes MvC2, SKN. In fact it's a garbage game with the worst community of all time. Black dudes yelling "AW S*** SON, DAT CABLE GOT YOO ON LOCKDAWN! AAWWW BAYBAY!!"

Do you want KOF to become that? Well SKN, it never will because NO ONE LIKES KOF! If it wasn't for Mexico, you guys would be bankrupt (again.), you don't have the wide variety of games that a powerhouse like Capcom does (and don't get me wrong, Capcom is a shady company who churn out half assed crap all the time). You have to get Ignition to localize games like 98 UM a year after release! When is KOF XII slated, June 2012!?

But hey! The grafikz! They're bootyful! No, they aren't. They are totally disproportionate and the animations are incredibly slow. Apparently the frames are going to be sped up but that may cause as many issues as keeping them sluggish, you have to draw multiple frames to make up for the speed difference. Also, from what this reporter has heard, SKN doesn't draw frames because when Terry does Burn Knuckle he just poofs out of existence like The Flash and decks them in the face rather than the fly forward animation that we're used to and at least makes more sense than the Hungry Wolf using the Speed Force!!

He just appears in your face!!

But anyway, on with other stuff.

DW Gundam 2 -Quattro Bajeena is a CHAR! Best DW game since 5 Empires.Very addictive but if you don't like DW you won't like this. 7/10

Wolverine aka Australian Actors Origins: Hugh Jackman- The cutscenes are what the movie should have been! The game is just lousy beat-em up though. 4/10

WarioWare Inc.-Yeah it took me about this long to play it. Pretty fun, pretty stupid. Jimmy is amazing. 6/10

N+- If you played N-Game, this is the upgrade on crack! 8/10

Disgaea 2 Portable- Not as good as Disgaea 3, not as funny as Disgaea 1, not as good as FFT but Adell has a tie and Rozalin is hot. 7/10

Sonic Chronicles The Dark Brotherhood- I wish this was just a re-skin of Mass Effect. It's probably the best Sonic related game that has come out for about 5 years. It's a good RPG, give it a shot. 8.5/10

Prinny- Pretty hard, I didn't expect that what with the 1000 lives thing but yeah, I'm pretty afraid of this game kicking my ass. It's pretty good, pick it up if it isn't sold out. 7/10

Romancing SaGa- Wow, this game is amazilicious! Man if The Last Remnant sucked less and had better art direction and no Johnny Yong Bosch and no load times and fun and a good battle system and more charcters and PS2 graphics. I don't know what I was getting at but this game was an amazing find! 10/10

Tenchu 2 Stealth Assasins- Back when Tenchu was good. 8/10

Final Fantasy VII- This is not the greatest game ever made GameFaqs, sorry. It's a good game but IX is better and that's just out of the PSX ones. 7.5/10

MadWorld- Made me want a Wii. And that's pretty tough! Look Pimpin'/10

Megaman Powered Up- SO HARD! OH MAN!! WHAT!? SO HAAAAARD!!! GOD DAAAAAAAMN! One of the best MM games. 9/10


So yeah those are my reviews and I'm gonna see Hugh Jackman The Movie tonight with some chums, it should be